Burden: To make (someone) hold or carry something heavy or accept or deal with something difficult: to put a heavy burden on (someone).
This word right here brings about strong emotions for me. I understand the thought behind it when you’re feeling a lot of the weight in coping through this new condition. I’m sure having lung cancer along with any other chronic illness...well it sucks!
Journeys may differ, but the feelings are universal
For the many of you later in years, the thought making it to this mature age with careers in the past and enjoying life -- to be struck. As well, for the many young who have so much to do, whether starting a family, getting married or continuously making moves in your careers -- to be struck. There’s no rule book how the journey falls for many of us, but when the cards fall having a team of people championing for you, well, that should never be considered a burden, especially for those who truly care for you and your wellbeing.
Never a burden
I don’t recall how the conversation went but I think it was when I met my mom at one of her appointments. I remember getting there a few minutes late and there was my mom waiting and giving me that huge smile to see that her baby made it. After the smile, I got the “What took you so long?” speech, which brings a big smile to my face reflecting. Well somewhere in this conversation, again my memory gets hazy thinking back when this helluva lady was on this earth, but I recall her saying...“I wish I wasn’t a burden to you”. “Huh, like how and why would you say that?”
I don’t think I gave my mom grief about taking care of matters or listening to what she was going through, so just her using that word burden made me upset. I guess you have to know your support team, and a good one if they’re there for you, then they know what this is about. To help those in need, weather the storm, and allow them to be who they are in that moment is what this is about. The word burden should never show its senseless head or be uttered. It’s been 8 years and 5 months and I tell you till this day, I hate when the word burden is used! I suppose when you feel defeated you may think a burden is what you are in the moment, and that is furthest from the truth.
We're in this together
You got this and we got you. Now, I know my mother had to know somewhere deep in the membrane that she had a slew of people rooting for her, especially those who knew what was happening. I suppose despite knowing what is evident she felt it necessary to use the word, as I suppose many people feel they become this word “Burden”. This is hard but let me say we can never predict when life happens. However, we all pray that we have those around us who can cover and have our backs at the end of the day.
The time to fight is now, with integrity, grace, hope, and a smile...when you feel like it.
Do you find that staying zen through your lung cancer diagnosis has helped you in your journey?