RIP Kobe Bryant

What a thing we call life. Having cancer makes you see it a lot differently. As cancer patients, whenever you hear about someone passing due to the illness, it hits you in layers.

Processing the shock of sudden loss

This time it happened while my friends were helping me clean up after my son’s 5th birthday party. I asked about a post I saw recently on Facebook that had a picture of my friend and a middle aged woman with the caption ‘Joanna, may you rest in peace’. I asked how did she die and that split second of hesitation she took before answering my question already gave her response. I felt sad and scared because though doctors had given Joanna 2 months to live, she made it to 9 months and left behind three small kids. In that instance, I thought ‘wow, that could’ve been someone talking about me’.

Remembering Kobe's legacy

We went home shortly after and my son was so excited opening up all his presents. It totally warmed my heart to see him so happy and I made a silent prayer that I can live to see more of these milestone moments. Not 5 minutes later did my brother text with the shocking news that Kobe Bryant died in a helicopter crash along with his daughter. I was so stunned that I blurted the news out to my husband, almost forgetting that our kids were right in front of us.

This one is really hard. When a legend like this dies unexpectedly, just starting the second half of his life, society is forced to pause and think about their mortality even if it’s only for a brief moment. I grew up watching Kobe Bryant play basketball. Whenever I would throw objects, be it a ball or crumpled up paper, into a receptacle, I’d silently mutter to myself ‘Kobe’ because he was synonymous with basketball greatness. And now after retiring from the game, it was so heartwarming to see him coach his daughter ‘Gigi’ which all of us knew was destined for further greatness.

A helicopter ride at Copacabana

I remember during my recent helicopter ride in Brazil feeling both excited and scared. It was an experience that had been on my bucket list so when the opportunity came, I jumped at it because you only live once, right?

As we ascended higher, making our way towards the famous 'Christ the Redeemer' and taking in the spectacular panoramic view of Copacabana and skyline of Rio de Janeiro. I was consumed in awe. Suddenly, we hit some turbulence and my bubble was burst by slight internal panic and thoughts of ‘what if we crash?!’ I quickly pushed that thought away and instead said to myself ‘I’m trying to survive stage IV lung cancer, every other fear pales in comparison’!

One life to live

This diagnosis feels like a constant cloud over my head but the truth is we’re all living with a terminal death sentence and none of us know when our time to leave this Earth will come. We need to stop taking life for granted and assuming that we have all the time in the world to patch things up, finally do those things we’ve always wanted to do, and take better care of ourselves both mentally and physically.

None of us know when it’s our turn to say goodbye. We can only hope that when it is, we will leave a lasting impact as Kobe Bryant did no matter how big or small. I pray for his family and especially his wife who lost a husband and daughter on the same day. Such a loss is unimaginable and no words can convey how truly heartbreaking this is. I will make sure to hug my kids extra tight and continue to be grateful for every additional day I get to live.

Editor’s Note: We are extremely saddened to say that on May 26, 2021, Angie Brice Hessbruegge passed away. Angie's thoughtful writings and advocacy efforts will continue to reach many. She will be deeply missed.