The Holidays and My Family, Again
Last updated: January 2023
Since my father passed, the holidays haven't been the same. This will be my second Christmas without him. My sister is living in San Diego and can't visit. Therefore, Karley (my senior in high school) and I drove up to visit my mom, which is about a 5-hour drive. Her health hasn't been the best lately.
Seeing my family
We threw a Mixon family Christmas party - which we haven't done in ages. We were going to do it last year, and my dad committed to going early on, but we didn't realize he wouldn't be with us by that time last year, and then none of our schedules would allow it.
My cousin is graduating from college this semester. It's so funny because he reminds me of my dad. He's already an old soul at heart, and family means more to him than anything else. He grew closer to my dad in those final days and was almost as devastated as my sister and me when my dad left us.
Parenting over the holidays isn't easy
Having a teenager is so rough. Karley decided to go to Georgia Southern and just finished her housing application.
Lately, we've been at each other's throats. I know all mothers and daughters clash at some point. I guess I'm just more sensitive than usual. And she is undergoing more stress than usual. She will be graduating and going away to college.
Meanwhile, I'll be trying to figure out what I will do. I've always counted on her, and it scares me that she won't be there anymore. I'm already going through empty nest syndrome. I don't care how much we argue; I will always love her very much. Nothing will change that. She's the reason I fight.
Should I move away from my daughter?
I'm considering moving to North Georgia, away from beach life. I want a more serene and quiet place to live out the rest of my days. So, this is the last holiday season I will be living with Karley. Just typing that is depressing. Since I didn't think I would live, I didn't prepare mentally or financially. However, I started picking up some new hobbies since I was here.
Finding happiness in my hobbies
One of those hobbies is wreath making. I love making them this time of year; you can get most of your supplies from the dollar store. Another hobby I've gotten into is antiquing. I now have a booth at an antique shop and love learning from the owners. There's so much to it. Everyone has their niche, and to deal in the antique trade, you have to know everything. Thank you, Google!
Livin' day by day
As far as living, I keep having the realization that it'll probably be just me, forever (and Stitch, of course!) And don't get me wrong, I'm totally fine with that. I'm just concerned about declining health and not having the independence I've always been accustomed to. If you're married or even in a relationship, you have someone to count on. Since neither of those applies to me, I'm trying to think outside the box.
My cousin, who is just graduating, may split an apartment with me until we both get some savings built up. We are history buffs like my dad, and I doubt we would ever get bored. This evening, as we talked, I could truly see the love he has for all of us. I told him about my fear of being alone and getting sicker. He then told me I could always count on him, and he meant it.
We all love each other, no matter the age
The Mixon Christmas party this year was so much fun, hanging out at my cousin John Allen and Callie's house. This was the first family party Karley had been to. She had a blast and loved getting to know that side of the family better. The constant smile on her face just reassured me that I needed to move back to Atlanta.
It's funny the plethora of ages all of my cousins are. We are all 14 years apart in age. But from 17 and up, we are all the same, as I remember. Time didn't change us, or our love for each other.
The trip reassured me that I still have that family who loves me, and would come together for Karley and me.
Is there a lung cancer metaphor that bothers you the most?
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