Hi VIKKR.
I completely understand you. I didn't realize how dismissive my oncologist was until I got a new one. I had to change for insurance reasons, but it put me in a much better environment.
As far as the depression. My therapist handles all of my psychological medications. When my oncologist first suggested I visit with a psychiatrist, i poo pooed it. Once I finally went to her, I wish I had gone long before. She got me out of the rabbit hole. She helped me find purpose in life again. I see her usually once a month. That was definitely a lung cancer survivor life changing move.
I just realized you are SMALL cell lung cancer. I am non small cell lung cancer. I get frustrated watching TV. Every other commercial is cancer related. I have found a few new shows on Netflix. I get half way through the season and BAM! Someone is diagnosed with lung cancer. Really? And of course what the character is faced with is no where close to the real deal.
I discussed this issue with my psychiatrist. I learned that it is completely normal for me to feel this way. It is completely OK to not be OK. That was a big eye opener session with my psychiatrist. I highly encourage you to add a psychiatrist or psychologist to your medical team. If your Oncologist can't suggest one, back to first scenario, find a new Oncologist!
You should never feel dismissed by anyone on your medical team.
I'm so sorry about your car. I read another response whom uses a transit service. I am in small town Ohio. Our transit service runs the same as she described. Pick you up, take you to your appointment, sometimes waits for you or plan a pick up time. Take you home or to another appointment or grocery, etc. 2 bucks. I agree with Lisa. Look into finding your local transit service.
Definitely, don't be hard on yourself. Time on earth is too short for that. Surround yourself with happiness.
Madmeg