Woman kneeling down over a butterfly, perched on top of a fallen scoop of ice cream from the woman's cone.

Finding Solace

Though the last year and a half have been the pits for so many reasons, and COVID being one of them; somewhere deep within us all is a spark of good times and good memories. It’s those certain times of the year that become gloomy because many of those cherished loved ones are no longer here to reflect on those silly summer days.

A few weeks back upon visiting my old stomping ground in Brooklyn, New York, we heard the grand sound of the Mr. Frosty truck. I don’t know where you all originate from, but that was a big deal growing up, hearing that annoying little old-time melody from afar while trying to throw on one pant leg and then another to rush to meet this infamous ice cream delight. I had the pleasure of sharing this experience with my baby, who’s too young to understand the significance but not too young not to enjoy a slight cold sugar rush on a hot day.

All in a day’s work

Finding just the smallest joys to make the journey more manageable is sometimes the solace we need to move forward. Speaking from a caregiver’s perspective remembering what it was like and how things were said brings a slight but necessary reminder of the good times.

As I recall that Mr. Frosty truck, I remember bugging my mother for the money needed to buy that ice pop and depending on my behavior (usually good) whether going for those pants to dart was even necessary. The high of having that shiny quarter (or two) hit my hand for that bomb pop, man was it a delight! It was all in a day’s work of doing what I was supposed to do, with a reward right behind it.

Following rules and doing our best

We also know that following the rules of self-care usually is supposed to bring about stellar and exceptional health; however, that’s not always the case. We may do the best that is expected of us to get the reward, and whatever that may be, but the reward is not there, and sometimes you may find yourself in the same boat as everyone else.

Unfortunately, there’s no perfect script of why this happens or that, but it comes back to doing the best you can do at that moment.

Finding solace in our stories

I recall my mother going down memory lane and her hint of humor on reflecting about her life. Despite the doctor providing that unforeseen news, there was still some glimmer of finding that solace. I tell you how I soaked up every word she spoke, though some of it seems blurry today.

Just as I reflected on Mr. Frosty, she too would have similar stories of running to the candy store, when only a penny was the fee. I appreciated hearing the stories of her life, marriage, family, loves and losses, and all those in between.

I know that as she told those what would be final stories it also made her feel good in recollecting her journey, even more so for those better stories that offered that bright smile of solace.

The time to fight is now, with integrity, grace, hope, and a smile...when you feel like it.

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